What do I really mean when I say I’m a coach?

Chris Coraggio
Apr 15
4 min read

Well, to start, NONE OF THESE.

If you’re reading this, you’re either curious about coaching, or you’ve scheduled a discovery call with me, and I already gave you homework (how DARE me?!).

Let me save you some time before you talk to any coach.

There's no technically "right" answer to that question, so let me say I'm coming from a more “purist” perspective. The coaching I'm talking about can also be defined as "Big C" coaching, so that the line is very clear. Big C separates the roles we know as consultant/advisor, mentor, manager, therapist, teacher, etc., from coaching, because coaching can easily be blurred. And no, absolutely not, coaches are not "gurus" or influencers. Just...no. Not now, not ever.

To be fair, it's the original sin of the coaching profession to call it “coaching” in the first place. We collectively first learned to coach in the context of sports. BAD idea to try to wrestle the meaning of coach from a beloved part of sports around the world. I digress.

Let’s first figure out what “coach” is defined if not in the context of sports.

Let me start with a few definitions:

Institute for Executive Coaching & Leadership - a structured, question-based conversation that helps individuals identify and remove obstacles hindering their potential. It's a process of exploring goals, current situations, taking action, and reflecting on progress.
International Coaching Federation - a partnership with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential
Institute for Life Coach Training - a professional relationship that helps people produce extraordinary results in their lives, careers, businesses, or organizations, helping them to bridge the gap between where they are now and where they want to be.

In summary, what is common is:

WHAT WE DO: Coaching is about helping clients set and meet goals that matter to them
- Coaching is more about removing obstacles, rather than adding anything
HOW WE DO IT: Coaching conversations are question-based, where the client does the work
COACH'S MINDSET: Coaching assumes that the clients come to us already whole, capable, creative, and resourceful - we know clients already have what it takes to reach their goals

With this summary above, let's compare the differences between these services. Note that these are generalizations, and the descriptions won't capture all nuances of the services.

Dimension	Coaching (Big C)	Therapy	Mentoring	Teaching	Consulting / Advising
Primary Focus	Future-oriented growth, clarity, and achievement of self-defined goals	Healing past trauma, emotional health, and mental well-being	Long-term development through shared experience	Knowledge transfer and skill development	Solving specific problems or improving performance
Role of the Client	Expert on themselves; responsible for insight and action	Patient or client seeking healing or support	Learner seeking guidance and wisdom	Student or learner	Client receiving expert solution or recommendation
Role of Practitioner	Thought partner; facilitates reflection, asks powerful questions	Diagnostician and healer	More experienced guide sharing lessons from lived experience	Instructor or explainer of concepts	Subject-matter or strategic expert
Use of Questions	Central tool to unlock awareness and insight	Used to diagnose and understand	Often used, but advice is also common	Used occasionally; mainly directive	Rare; mostly directive
Gives Advice?	Rarely, and only with permission	Sometimes, within therapeutic context	Frequently, based on personal experience	Frequently, to teach and direct understanding	Yes—core to the role
Expertise Required	Expertise in the coaching process, not the client’s subject matter	Clinical or psychological expertise	Experience in a relevant field	Subject-matter expertise	Deep domain expertise or industry knowledge
Power Dynamic	Equal partnership	Unequal; therapist holds diagnostic authority	Mentor has more experience and influence	Teacher holds authority over student	Consultant positioned as expert or authority
End Goal	Empower the client to access their own wisdom and move forward	Restore well-being and functioning	Accelerate development by learning from another’s experience	Help learners acquire and apply knowledge	Provide solutions or recommendations to improve specific outcomes

What should I expect when working with a coach?

Expect to do all the work. Expect to be asked a lot of questions, often questions you haven't thought about. Expect that you'll be challenge. Expect that the process is messy. Expect the unexpected - things will come up that you didn't realize you were thinking or feeling. Expect that what you say you want in the beginning of the session is not the same as where you end up at the end. Expect that you will go many places in a single conversation. Expect that you'll do months worth of thinking in 1 single conversation.

What should I NOT expect when working with a coach?

DO NOT expect to be given anything. DO NOT expect that the process will be linear and smooth. DO NOT expect that the conversation will be predictable. DO NOT expect that the conversation will be easy. DO NOT expect the coach to do anything for you.

When should I talk to a coach?

A coach is great when you have a specific goal in mind or something you want in the future. Coaches are about helping you move forward in your life and at work, not to process and understand the past. Coaches that are not "specialized" (i.e. health coach, business coach, spiritual coach, etc.) can pretty much help you with any sitaution that does not require specialized knowledge. Are you feeling stuck? In a difficult situation? Have something you want to accomplish? Not sure what the right decision is? All of these are excellent situations where a coach can help.

If you're thinking about coaching, just hop on a discovery call (here's my calendar) with multiple